She’s on the floor, bare skin against concrete. A spreader bar locks her legs, one side suspended from a rope and anchored to the floor. Her cuffed wrists are chained to an eye bolt on the wall.
I sit down casually beside her and stroke her hair. My gaze penetrates hers. She looks away, but I grab her roughly by the hair and turn her head back. She’s uncomfortable, and she’s scared. I can smell it off her. My thumb presses against her lips, contouring them, pushing inside, feeling her tongue. My fingers follow, taking that wetness and transferring it to her cunt. Light strokes down the valley. She’s already moving. I could take her there now, but I’ve got something different in mind.
The finger rubs deeper. Her breath rushes in stronger. Her eyes relax a little. I move to the nub, placing my calloused finger there, letting her own movement stimulate. The first moan. Her hips sway gently, and I keep my finger in place. Her breath starts catching as those hips move, stimulating in maddening insistency. She wants it. She wants it bad. I help her along, still looking into those pretty eyes, which are now becoming unfocused. She’s losing awareness of her surroundings. There is only her body, useless, and me, the only source of stimulation. She’s grunting out moans now, and I help her along. My fingers are wet with her.
“Unf sir may I please cum?” she asks. “Do you deserve to cum?” I respond. “I…” she falls silent. “I asked you a question, girl. Do you deserve to cum?” She’s struggling with the answer. I take my finger away and hold her by the chin, my eyes looking into hers. “Answer the question.” “No…” she says finally, her eyes filling with tears. “What do you deserve?” I say, my eyes boring into hers. “I… I deserve to be hurt, sir.” she says, blinking away the tears. I press on. “Why do you deserve to be hurt?” “Because I’m no good.” she says, choking back a sob. “Where should I hurt you?” I ask. “Does your cunt deserve to be hurt?” “Yes, sir.” she says through the tears.
I pull out a small length of welding rod and begin striking her cunt. She winces, the tears falling down. “Is this what you deserve, cunt?” I ask, keeping a steady rhythm, striking the same spot. “Yes, sir.” she says. “What are you?” I ask. “I’m a cunt, sir.” she says. I start striking harder. “What are you?” I ask again. “I’m your cunt, sir.” I increase the intensity. “What are you?” I ask. “Aah! I… I…” “What are you?” “I’m a worthless cunt!” I hit even harder. “What are you?” “I’m a fuckup!” Harder. “WHAT ARE YOU?” “I’m fucking worthless!” “WHAT ARE YOU?” The floodgates open. “I’m useless! I’m worthless!” she sobs. “I’m a total fuckup! I never do anything right! Aaah! Sir may I please cum?” “Not yet. Keep going.” I keep hitting her very red cunt. “Aaah! I’m just an ugly bitch! No one could love me!” She’s crying hysterically now. “I FUCKING HATE MYSELF!!!” “Cum now.” I say. She goes off like a rocket. I continue torturing her cunt as she shudders and convulses. Finally, her throat opens and she draws in a deep breath, and screams; a long, primal scream. I untie the spreader bar and lower it so that she’s on her stomach, then lift her by the waist. “Daddy’s gonna fuck you now.” I say, and ram it home. It doesn’t take long for her to cum again. I piston into her but I’m pretty damn close as well, and fill her.
She’s on the floor, limp, eyes swollen. I undo her bonds, and lift her up to sit. She collapses against me, her body still shaking from the quiet sobs. “Do you know what you are?” I say softly in her ear as I stroke her hair. “You’re my little girl.”
omg i'm so happy about your answer to that question about loving someone without loving yourself. i've been reading posts to the contrary for so long and hearing it from people... and it made me feel like my genuine feelings for some people were some maimed, mutated, distant cousin of love bc i'm not good at caring about myself. made me feel like i wasn't giving that person what they deserved.
I don’t know where this whole “you must love yourself before you can love someone else” thing came from, but it’s utter horse shit.
Sir, What is your favorite blunt punishment device (whips, canes, paddles, etc.)
My favorite is the cane, because it offers very precise control. I can go heavy on her ass, or light on her cunt. I can build up, letting her believe that she can handle me, watching her expression change as the pain slowly becomes unbearable, watching her eyes plead with despair…
My second favorite is the whip, because it can reach her anywhere, wrapping around her body to strike if need be. If she’s suspended by the wrists, she can twist and turn and struggle all she likes, but there’s no escaping when I want to hit a specific spot.
It’s the one thing a submissive fears most. Shouting, beatings, thunderous rages, belittling. Anything nasty you can think of, she can handle, except for one: Rejection.
Rejection means the loss of her security. It means loneliness. It means sadness. It means self-hate and guilt. There is no pain more soul crushing than that of abandonment.
What does that mean, in practice?
It means that a dominant must keep this truth in mind with everything he does. It means CONSTANT reassurance. It means don’t “play” with abandonment, because even if you think it’s fun joke, all you’re doing is reinforcing her insecurities and fears.
It also means that she will lie to you, and withhold the truth. No matter how open and communicative you think she is, she is holding things back from you, guaranteed. Why? Because she’s afraid (terrified, really) that if you ever found out, you’d abandon her. In fact, every single little negative thing she sees in herself is just one more brick in the road to you leaving her. Yes, that’s literally how she sees it. Is it any wonder she has these little episodes where she wakes up scared, almost hysterical sometimes, gets morose (because she knows this relationship won’t last and she’ll be alone again), has nervous habits, engages in self harm, or even starts pushing you away (to minimize the pain when you’ll inevitably leave her later). YES, THIS IS WHAT GOES ON INSIDE HER HEAD!
Submissive girls are a LOT of work. They are high maintenance, and require a LOT of hand holding. Chances are also high that they’ll come from a long string of short duration relationships where her man has finally gotten tired of all of the above. Why? Because there are not very many men in the world who understand that kind of psyche, let alone are actually willing to manage and care for such a girl. It also means that there’s a high chance she has a history of being abused, which means there will be a number of things that can trigger her anxieties.
So what should I do?
You must reassure her, often.
You must infer a lot of the things she’s not telling you.
You must train her in being open, and practice it with her often.
You must ALWAYS be consistent with her.
Learn what triggers her anxieties. It’s on you to manage them.
Don’t ever get angry when she keeps asking the same things over and over again. This is what you signed up for. Shit or get off the pot.
Realize that no matter how secure she is with you, no matter how well you provide for her, no matter how much you reassure her, she’ll ALWAYS have this insecurity. It’s reason for COMPASSION, not annoyance.
You must not wear a mask with your dom. It’s perfectly OK (I’d even say necessary) with other people, but you must always be your true self with your dom. And that’s going to be HARD to do.
Tell him when you’re feeling insecure. A good dom will reassure you. A bad dom will get angry or annoyed, and you don’t want a bad dom.
Don’t let your fear of rejection trap you in a bad relationship. A bad relationship is less intense pain than rejection, but it never stops, until the selfish prick gets bored and leaves.
Try not to feel bad about your insecurities. It comes with the territory.
They exist, and considering the many horror stories I’ve heard from my followers, they’re insidious and a threat to us all.
First off, I’m going to tell you what’s NOT a good dominant:
A man who breaks his word
This means everything from ignoring safe words to blowing past hard limits, right down to agreeing to something, and then later changing his mind and calling privilege to do so since “he’s in charge.”
A proper dominant ALWAYS honors his agreements, even if he regrets making them later. A gentleman’s word is his bond, and he does not break it lightly.
A man who expects perfection
You are not perfect, nor will you ever be. So anyone who demands perfection isn’t being realistic.
In fact, a true dom is specifically interested in your imperfections. If you have no flaws, there’s no room to grow. And one thing a dom loves to do is guide his submissive and help her grow.
A man who expects you to already be trained
Training is a joy for a dominant. A man who refuses to train you is suspect, to say the least.
A man who is inconsistent
Stability and security are first and foremost what a submissive needs. An inconsistent man can provide neither. If the majority of decisions you make are met with the thought “I wonder if he’ll get angry”, then you are dealing with an inconsistent man.
A good dominant makes sure his submissive understands the rules, and never changes them without telling her. If she does something to anger him, but could not have possibly known that it would, he has only himself to blame.
A man who ignores your needs
It’s one thing to withhold a need in order to prove a point, or to heighten that need for a later release. But to entirely ignore a need is selfish and unbecoming of a man of honor.
A man who blames everyone but himself
There’s a word for this, and the word is egotist. Unfortunately, many people who consider themselves dominants are actually egotists. Their insecurity requires them to be perfect in the eyes of those they’re close to. They’ll tend to have selective memories, changing the facts to make themselves look better. They’ll shift blame off themselves (usually to you). The more involved they get with you, the more they’ll need to keep you off balance so that they can keep a positive narrative of themselves.
A man who cuts off your social circles and support lines
These are probably some of the worst, because they’ll tell you crazy things like “you should only be listening to your master.” or “I should be all the support you need.” Once they’ve cut off your support line, your only human contact is them, which makes it very easy to twist you around and manipulate you.
A man who is undisciplined
Sorry, but a man who can’t even take care of himself and discipline himself has no business doing it to someone else. If he’s telling you to get more exercise, for example, he’d better damn well be doing the same himself.
A man with a temper
A true dominant is disciplined, and never lets his anger get the better of him. This is doubly important because you are at his mercy, and a man short on temper is also short on mercy (and respect).
An impatient man
Patience is one of the primary aspects of a good dominant. He needs that if he ever expects to have a hope in hell of training someone effectively. An impatient man is an undisciplined man, and cannot be relied upon.
A man who won’t help you recover
A man who can’t help you recover from some illness or trauma is a weak man. You can’t depend on a weak man. A man who leaves you over it is just pathetic.
The Acid Test
If you’re in doubt, take the acid test: Do you feel knots in your stomach?
Knots are bad, mmkay? A dominant who gives you a knotted stomach is being abusive. You can lie to yourself all you want, but your body knows the truth, and won’t be denied.
Submissives tend to have guilt issues already, so it’s very easy to blame yourself for their abuse. Beware of this trap. Remember to listen to your body. His abuse is NOT your fault. It’s entirely, 100% HIS FAULT.
Another thing submissives have in spades is empathy. This leads to trap #2: Thinking that you can help him overcome his abusiveness. THAT DOESN’T WORK! Period. Full stop. No, your case is not special. No, your mitigating circumstances don’t change the truth. An abuser is an abuser, and you can’t change that.
Submissives also tend to have tremendous endurance. This leads to trap #3: Trying to endure, hoping that things will get better. Repeat after me: If he’s abusive now, he will ALWAYS be abusive. NOTHING will change that.
What to do if you’re in an abusive relationship
Step 1: Get out. Make whatever plans you need to make, and execute on them. Get out of the relationship, by whatever means necessary.
Step 2: Break all contact with the abuser, other than to tell them it’s over. No phone calls, no texts, no emails, no facebook, no meetings on the street. BREAK ALL TIES. Manipulative abusers will use any opening, no matter how small, to wedge their way back into your life. The only way with this type of person is to completely block them out. They’ll try every trick they know, saying they’re sorry, saying they’ll change, sometimes even using threats (in which case, call the police!). But after a few months, they’ll lose interest, and start looking for a new victim.
If you still can’t decide whether you’re in an abusive situation or not, get a second opinion. Ask someone you trust. Hell, ask me. I promise to be brutally impartial.
There’s one very common trait among submissive girls, and that is empathy. An empathy so strong that she will sometimes even physically experience the pain of those around her. She becomes so attuned to the feelings and moods of others that she can’t help but do something, serving, supporting, caring.
Such empathy also makes her extremely sensitive to approval and disapproval, to the point where she’ll do anything to bring happiness to those she cares about, and feels an overbearing pain any time she disappoints.
This sensitivity can lead to all sorts of pathologies. It may cause her to close herself off from the world because it’s too intense. Often, she’ll remember vividly her every single transgression, real or imagined, against anyone, for her entire life. The guilt can be crushing, the need for absolution so great that she’ll even resort to cutting or otherwise harming herself in some way just to feel some catharsis and absolution, however temporary.
These girls, once this part of them is discovered, are viewed as crazy, treated as crazy, medicated as crazy, perhaps even institutionalized as crazy. But here’s the problem: You’re only looking at the symptom, not the cause.
They’ve collected a lifetime of guilt. And not just any ordinary guilt; a soul crushing guilt that they’re desperate to offload somehow. But our modern society provides no way for them to do so; in fact, it doesn’t even recognize that such a need could even exist. Many past religious movements did it through self-flagellation, but that’s now viewed as equally crazy.
And so they drift, alone, lost. Some become masochistic, seeking out a sadist who can bring the pain they seek and deserve. Sadists are viewed as borderline crazy themselves, and often as predators, but they serve one very important function:
A sadist enjoys inflicting pain. This is what we’re all taught. But what we’re never told is WHY they inflict pain. In fact, most sadists themselves don’t consciously know why. A good sadist has strong empathy. He inflicts pain because he knows the effect it has on his victim (for want of a better word). He focuses and channels it, like a conductor, to the areas he feels they’re best served. It’s not specifically the pain so much as the psychological effect of the pain that drives him. Since no one is ever trained in this, he goes by instinct, bringing about helplessness and despair until the victim’s defenses finally crumble and her mind is laid bare. It is this violation of the mind and soul that he seeks. Violation of the body is merely a tool to achieve it. When her mind is left defenseless, he goes to work, pulling out and examining the darkness inside her, everything she’s ashamed of, everything she hates about herself, her fears, insecurities, loathings, the crushing fear that nobody could ever love her if they really knew her. All of this is laid bare as he plunders her mind, and yet he doesn’t turn away in disgust. Instead, he pulls her along as he explores with the excitement of discovery.
You see, he wants to KNOW her. ALL of her. Especially the parts she doesn’t want anyone to know. And after seeing everything she hates about herself, he loves her even more. He accepts her, the broken girl, and loves her.
There comes a point in training a sub for a particular thing, that you reach the darkest hour. She’s feeling discouraged, you’re giving out too many punishments, and both are wondering how much longer this can go on. But then, the magical moment arrives.
It’s really hard to describe unless you’ve experienced it, but there’s a very definite “breakthrough” moment, where she finally succeeds, and your pride for her swells. She hasn’t done it perfectly, but that’s not the point. The point is that she’s successfully taken that step. You can fine-tune later. For now, it’s the magical moment where your heart swells and you drop everything and kiss her and tell her how fucking proud of her you are. It’s times like this which make a dominant’s day, and make all of the training and pain and punishments and guidance worth it. She’s become a better slave, and your combined efforts have brought it to fruition.
I live for those moments, and it’s a lot of what drives me to train her. That’s why my only requirement of a slave is dedication.